It’s been a long time since I’ve written a post about the neighborhood and my annoying neighbors. It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything. It’s been a long cold winter and I haven’t gotten out much. And it seemed futile to rant about my neighbor’s plastic flowers and cruddy “statuary” that was planted around our shared front porch in March 2013 and stayed under several snow dumps through the recent winter.
But I digress.
At 9pm on Wednesday, my doorbell rang. As a single woman who lives alone, I find that somewhat alarming. Anyone who knows me would certainly call or text first. I cautiously peeked out the side window and saw my next door neighbor, The Long Talker. Great.
I opened the door with my arms firmly folded across my chest. (At that time of day, most women would do the same, having already shed the bra and wearing only the old XL tie dye t-shirt.)
LT was there to inform me that he’d be going away for a few days and asked if I would mind taking in his mail. No problem, LT. It would have been better if you’d simply dropped me a text, but sure, no problem. As I started to close the door, he then informed me that he was expecting a package from UPS and would I take it inside if it was delivered – our UPS and FedEx guys just leave packages on the porch without signature. Again, I told him I’d be happy to do it. Just go away and let me get back to watching hockey.
The next day, I pulled in his mail. As of 5pm, no packages had arrived and at that point I wasn’t really thinking about the package anymore. My friend arrived for dinner around 6pm and the porch was still package-free. About an hour later, I decided to take the wiener dog for a quick walk before beginning to prepare dinner. I opened the front door and could barely access the porch because of the five huge boxes that had suddenly appeared. Thank GOODNESS I had someone to help me pull them inside. Here’s “the package” Long Talker had asked me to tend:
I was mildly annoyed but figured, oh well – some day I may need the same favor.
Around 5pm on Friday, I opened the front door to find four more boxes:
Now I was really ticked off. But a short 24 hours later, it suddenly turned humorous when box number ten arrived:
I was quite grateful when he arrived home the next day. Any longer and I would have had to move out to accommodate what appears to be an aggressive home shopping habit. Thinking back over the last year that he’s lived there, and basically being home all day since I am a home-based worker, I do recall an unusually high number of visits to our building from our friendly local UPS and FedEx delivery guys. If these three days of deliveries are any indication, I suspect there is a serious hoarder situation going on.